Well thanks to a certain tool of mine being destroyed by someone pretending to be a rock star I have no microphone for a while. But I’m going to make you read my reviews mainly because I am evil like that.   For your enjoyment I present to you Dynamite by Taio Cruz.

I throw my hands up in the air sometimes 
Sayin' ay-oh, gotta let go 
I wanna celebrate and live my life 
Sayin' ay-oh, baby let's go

Oh Jesus, you couldn’t come up with a decent intro to your song other than filler? What Was “I want to party get the club booming like its dynomite” not working for you?  

I came to dance, dance, dance, dance 
I hit the floor 'cause that's my plans, plans, plans, plans 
I'm wearin' all my favorite brands, brands, brands, brands 
Give me some space for both my hands, hands, hands, hands 
Yeah, yeah 

Yeah I got it dude. Repeating words and auto-tuning the fuck out of them is popular in the pop music world. Can I have something relevant please? Or better yet a pop star than can actually do the singing.

'Cause it goes on and on and on 
And it goes on and on and on, yeah 

Really it just keeps going. Well no wonder why this song is popular it’s a party that don’t stop because like a Nick Cannon party because a Nick Cannon party don’t stop!

I throw my hands up in the air sometimes 
Sayin' ay-oh, gotta let go 
I wanna celebrate and live my life 
Sayin' ay-oh, baby let's go 

Yeah after a hard day of sitting in a recording studio listening to beats and typing lyrics in your computer, you deserve a brake. Go live it up and wave your hands in the air like you just don’t care.

'Cause we gon' rock this club 
We gon' go all night 
We gon' light it up 
Like it's dynamite 
'Cause I told you once 
Now I told you twice 
We gon' light it up 
Like it's dynamite 

Oh hey you took my advice of the dynamite and the club line.. Now if this song would end right here I would love your music forever. But I guess not since you need an album with more filler than a store brand chicken.

I came to move, move, move, move 
Get out the way of me and my crew, crew, crew, crew 
I'm in the club so I'm gonna do, do, do, do 
Just what the floor came here to do, do, do, do 
Yep, Yep 

Yeah, yeah, yeah, dance with your friends and rhyme DO WITH DO!

'Cause it goes on and on and on 
And it goes on and on and on, yeah 

-Insert one of the million party wont stop because its so and so’s party jokes here.-

I throw my hands up in the air sometimes 
Sayin' ay-oh, gotta let go 

Yeah, let go of your career because it’s slowly letting go of you. No really auto-tuning is going out of style faster than me eating a cheese and mustard sandwich.


I wanna celebrate and live my life 
Sayin' ay-oh, baby let's go 

Then why don’t you go do that instead of writing horrible songs like this?  In fact why don’t you and every other artist like you go do that!

'Cause we gon' rock this club 
We gon' go all night 
We gon' light it up 
Like it's dynamite 
'Cause I told you once 
Now I told you twice 
We gon' light it up 
Like it's dynamite 

I regret giving you advice now….My life is slowly going to hell because of this. Time to get the jack and cokes ready!

I'm gonna take it all, I 
I'm gonna be the last one standing 
Higher over all, I 
I'm gonna be the last one landing 
'Cause I, I, I, believe it 
And I,I,I, I just want it all 
I just want it all 
I'm gonna put my hands in the air, hands in the air 
Put your hands in the air 

What is this song made of cliché rap lyrics from the late 80’s?  So far I have heard nothing more than stuff I heard growing up.

I throw my hands up in the air sometimes 
Sayin' ay-oh, gotta let go 
I wanna celebrate and live my life 
Sayin' ay-oh, baby let's go 

You know what I am swearing off girls who like you. Scratch that, make that anyone who likes you.

'Cause we gon' rock this club 
We gon' go all night
We gon' light it up 
Like it's dynamite 
'Cause I told you once 
Now I told you twice 
We gon' light it up 
Like it's dynamite

Oh god I need a high ball right now. I might have helped this guy get more popular. Oh dear me.

Any way its review time, this is actually is going to shock you but I hate this song. I know right a song on this show that I hate its just preposterous. This song to me is a train wreck from the beginning, starting with filler is like starting a movie with a nice big cock. Truthfully I am ashamed that I was able to call the whole dynamite being in the club line. Then there is the use of the cliché lines from old rap songs. Taio were you listening to the music from my childhood and decided to just lift lines from them. Better yet did you give the artist credit because that will ruin your career faster than Vanilla Ice’s

Then of course there is the repeating of lines and rhyming do with do. It’s kind of like saying you just don’t care anymore you just want the ass kissing and money. Anyway I need to go get some sleep and maybe have a Korean dream.